You’d be surprised how many people I run into that still seem flummoxed when I call the beer “3-CPO” instead of its full name, “3 Citrus Peel Out”. We’re doomed if more of my friends and fellow beer geeks aren’t picking up on this one.
But, you know better than to trust a strange computer, so pick up a 4-pack at your local beer retailer and see for yourself. I’m not supposed to know a power socket from a computer terminal.
3-CPO pours a golden protocol droid color and is fluent in over six million forms of communication, including a tart citrus nose and a fruity and acidic taste. The beer keeps babbling on about its mission to deliver blood orange juice, grapefruit and tangerine peel.
This beer goes down smooth, and in my belly it will find a new definition of pain and suffering as it’s slowly digested over a thousand years. Or at least a few hours.
Some people claim that this beer represents a significant departure from Southern Tier’s usual offerings, but we certainly don’t seem to be made to suffer. It’s not our lot in life.
3-CPO is programmed for etiquette, not destruction- although the relatively strong alcohol percent in this ironically nicknamed imperial wheat ale will remind you that surrender is a perfectly acceptable alternative in extreme circumstances.
If you manage to finish the 4-pack of 3-CPO, you’ll be malfunctioning within a day, you near-sighted scrap pile. And don’t let me catch you following me begging for help because you won’t get it.
Therefore, I suggest a new strategy. Let the beer win.